love, learning and yarn

summertime

2010-07-22T12:51:00.010-05:00

This is what I call a beautiful mess. Look at all these glorious books! Still waiting on 3 more in the mail that I picked up used. Our Livings Books curriculum order arrived yesterday, and I've been excitedly leafing through it, excitement building as I open each new book. I love books. I love book stores. I love that my kids love books. This curriculum looks promising for our family. It's full of living books! No dry text books written by a dozen different people, just good, entertaining, informative books, written by one author, telling a story about something or someone. I love it!

Rachel keeps running off with them and "reading" them :). She's been asking me every day for 2 weeks when we're going to start doing school again, and it's not even August yet! She's been working independently through Explode the Code, making great progress all on her own. I gave it to her a couple weeks ago because she kept begging to do school work, and I am enjoying my Summer off, as a teacher :)

How have I been enjoying it? Well, a little this and a little that... I have been cultivating my very first vegetable (or otherwise) garden! I have gained a new appreciation for farmers and the challenges they face when the rain won't come, or the rain comes at the wrong time, or the bugs come out in Biblical force. My poor little garden has suffered some hardship in its short life. I lost my sweet basil to a fungus, my tomato plants were both savagely attacked by a massive onslaught of tomato worms while we were out of town. I came home to some very sad looking tomato plants. I picked something like 45 of those worms off of my 2 tomato and 1 cucumber plants in a matter of days.

The plants have mostly recovered and we have recently planted some decorative gourds, which just sprouted yesterday. The seeds came in a mixed packet, so it should be interesting to see what pops up.

What else? Knitting. Knitting with wool. In July. Yep. That's me... I knit Christmas stockings in July. This was my first fair isle project and I really really liked it. I really want to make it in an alpaca/wool blend yarn, which is a little more expensive, but I knit a first-run in plain wool, just to get a feel for the project. I love it, though. I just finished it last night, except for the name, since I don't know who it will go to yet. It still needs to be blocked to even out the stitches and make it look more uniform in texture, but it's done! I'm in the process of debating yarn colors for the 4 I intend to make for my family. I'd also like to figure out some more quirky pictures to put on them, like a moose, maybe a sweater, coffee mugs or something like that. I just need to take out some graph paper and design my own, I think.

Settled? THEN what do I do?

2010-06-10T19:25:00.002-05:00

I'm dangerously close to being completely moved, unpacked, registered and settled in Missouri. I've been such a busy bee with all of the things that are involved when you move from one state to another that I'm not quite sure what I will do with myself once it is all done. It's a good thing I didn't have the foresight to fully grasp all that I was going to have to do to make this move successful, or I may have gone all deer-in-the-headlights and never gotten off the couch.

I still have some loose ends to tie up, like having Tim's car inspected and registered, plus he needs to get his Missouri drivers license, still, but I can't do that one for him. I got mine today (kind of exciting for me) but I have to take it back tomorrow and get it reprinted since they typed my address in wrong. So far, the whole process has been time-consuming, but not frustrating. My only concern is the tires on Tim's car. I hope they pass the safety inspection. He will need new tires soon, but I'm hoping we don't have to do that right now.

My washing machine is still broken. I'm finally having someone come out to look at it tomorrow. It would have been pointless to do before now since Tim hadn't been paid and we had no money to fix it, unless fixing it were super cheap, which I'm guessing it won't be. So $10 to have them come out and diagnose the problem. Hoping for loose connecting somewhere underneath rather than cracked or broken something. Apparently, it's possible the pump is broken or the outer drum is cracked, in which case, RIP 12+ year old Kenmore washer. I'm trying to just take all of this in stride and work it out as it comes.

One of the hardest things for me, emotionally, about moving has been not having my church family anymore. I'm super-introspective and I like to kind of look at my feelings from outside myself, so this whole move has been pretty interesting to me. I miss my church family so much. I know that I am kind of in the position of someone whose spouse died. The dearly departed is besainted in the heart and mind of the one left behind, and my beloved Live Oaks is pretty much right there. No other church is Live Oaks and even things that aren't negative are counted against prospective church-homes because they just aren't the same. I realize this. I know I'm being emotional and irrational. Yeah... don't really care yet, though.

I'm trying to give this one church a chance, but I'm really having a hard time separating the things that I really dislike from the things that I only dislike by comparison to Live Oaks. "It's different and I hate it!" my mind screams. I stood in service last week almost crawling out of my own skin taking in all of the different sensations. I looked at the overly-dramatic facial expressions on one of the worship team's faces. Like a 3 year old child, I stomped my feet and threw a fit... in my mind... about how I just wanted my church back. At that moment, as I chocked back tears, I hated everything about the church surrounding me. Ugh. I'm trying to be objective, but I'm mourning.

Ok, enough for now. I have to go to dinner. More later.

Goodbye, Wichtia.

2010-05-01T14:25:00.004-05:00

In 2 weeks, I get to say goodbye to this apartment. My children have always lived here, in this very apartment, since before birth. Tim and I have lived in this complex since we were married, nearly 9 years ago. It hasn't been too bad. We've been safe, and the rent has been low. We've been able to survive hard times here because it is an inexpensive place to rent and heat. I won't complain. What I will do is celebrate getting to leave!

In 2 weeks, I get to say goodbye to my upstairs neighbors who chain smoke around the clock, the stench of which always seems to find its way into my open windows. I pray to God our new place does not share this issue. I wish we weren't ending up in a rental, but for now, it makes sense. I'm also praying that the new place doesn't make Tim as sick as this place always has. He has bad animal and environmental allergies, and for some reason, this apartment is crazy dusty.

I've been surprised by the little things that I have realized I will miss. I've never been crazy about Wichita. It's not that it's a bad place to live; it is a decent enough place to raise a family, but there is little to do outside, and I grew up in northern California, where there is tons to do outside. I spent so much of my childhood and adolescence out-doors. The problem is twofold, stemming from the flatness and extreme weather in the area. There is nothing geographically appealing about the outdoors here, and the weather prevents most days from being pleasant outside.

I don't know exactly what the weather will be like in Kansas City, but I know there is a lot to do! I'm excited about all the lakes and parks and stuff. I've heard the weather is similar, but less sticky in the summer, and less icy in the winter, but with more rain and snow. I have a feeling it will be less windy since there are trees and hills to break up the wind. Wichita is like one big wind tunnel most of the year. I have always said there are 1 or 2 nice days a year here. Days when the temperature and humidity and wind are all suitable to spend the day outside. That's a bit of an exaggeration, but just a bit. The Spring and Fall are short, the Winter and Summer are long. It gets into single digit highs in the winter, and triple digit highs in the summer. I'm hoping what I've heard about KC is true.

Besides the obvious things (my family and church), there is a short list of other things that I expect to miss. I will miss the well-maintained roads, and the lack of traffic. I will miss the familiar faces at my local Walmart and Dillons. I will miss knowing my way around. I will miss Freddy's Frozen Custard. I don't know what else I will miss yet, because I don't yet know in which ways our new home will differ from the old.

I figure I can look it as a challenge or as an adventure. As something to overcome, or something to experience. Some people crave adventure. I know that there have been times over the last year that I have felt that way. I just wanted to experience something different and to push myself beyond my comfort zone. I want to look at this as an adventure and strive to take it all in. I don't want to just learn from overcoming a series of roadblocks, I want to enjoy the ride. I'm a deeply introspective person, so I look forward to observing my own reactions to the changes we will go through. How will I change? Will I grow? Will I stretch? What does God have in store for us up there? It's exciting!

The packing... that's another story! Not really looking forward to packing, but at least the company is paying for a moving company to pick up and deliver our stuff. And I don't think we really have all that much to pack. Clothes will be easy. Dishes, books, dvds, what else? Bathroom items, probably lots of miscellaneous crap. The place we live now is small, and has no storage space, so we should be ok. I hope my mom will come help me. She's awesome at getting me to do things I don't want to do alone... by doing them with me :) Moms are the best.

I can't think about the sad stuff yet. I'll be sad, I know it. No use in going through that now. I need to be strong and focused and motivated now. The rest will come after the storm. That's how I work. I'm great in a crisis, but afterward I feel it all. Gotta press on. It's my job. I know I'm not alone.

Moving.

2010-04-28T19:22:00.002-05:00

Well, we're moving. It seems to be hitting me one little bit at a time. First, before Tim applied for the position, he asked if I would be ok with moving. I told him I would. It is a great opportunity for him, and the people in his company obviously liked him for the job, "...so go ahead and apply and see what happens.", I said.

No big surprise, he got the job! Which is wonderful! I'm going to be sad about moving away from my family, but I've never really felt anchored to this place for any reason besides them being here. I don't know why, today, I feel a sense of loss. I've had a couple of weeks to adjust to the idea, and to prepare for the move, but today, first thing, I got a call back from a realtor about a townhome I had left a message about. For some reason, it became a little more real to me that we're moving.

I really don't know why I care. I honestly don't love the area we live in now. I think the Kansas City metro area is going to be a good place to live, and I think I will enjoy it. There are lots of things to do (which are desperately lacking in Wichita, unless you like bars), there are trees and clear water, out-door recreation, museums, all kinds of things that I have been longing for. I think it is just the fear of the unknown. And I know that when we get up there, I won't have a support system. I'll be away from my mom and sister for the first time in my life.

Admittedly, the situation, being what it is, couldn't be much better. We will only be about 3 hours away, and will have regularly scheduled business trips back to Wichita, which the kids and I are welcome and able to tag along on. I will still get to see my family every month-ish. Honestly, we don't really spend too much time visiting in person right now. My sister is about 15 minutes away, and my mom is about 50 minutes. I think I make social visits to see them no more than 2 times a month. I see my sister about once a week when I watch my nieces, but we mostly talk on the phone or connect online. Same with mom. I really think it's just fear getting to me, not rational things that I will actually miss.

I've been pretty excited and optimistic about the move, aside from the occasional moment of sadness about my family or panic about finding a place to live. I also will probably have to get rid of my birds, or leave them with my mom until we buy a house. Apparently, it's pretty customary to charge multi-hundred dollar, non-refundable pet deposits for tiny, caged birds in the Kansas City metro. We just can't and won't pay that much money. It's more than we paid for both birds and cages and food and toys, combined. It would be different if it were refundable, but apparently, they use it to "sanitize" the place after you move your pet out. I wonder what that looks like.

We're soon making a trip up to KC for an afternoon of looking at rentals in the burbs. I have a townhome community in mind, but they only have 2 units coming available in the next 2 months, and it's first come first served. Hoping they are still available Friday. We were thinking of living in another town, but I'm starting to think it is just too much driving for Tim. I'd like him to be close to his home office, especially since he will have to drive quite a bit to visit the other regional campuses.

It was a little discouraging to call up and figure out what our utilities will be up there. We live in an apartment that pays trash, sewer and water for us, so we aren't used to those. Plus, it is all electric, so places with additional gas bills add one more bill we don't currently pay. It all adds up. I called the utilities and city works about one property and we would average $140 in additional bills per month that we don't pay now. That's gas, water, sewer, and trash. Probably doesn't sound like much, but to us, it's like tacking on an extra $140 to our rent. That is a lot to us.

I know it will all be ok. I think God has really aligned things for this to take place, so I'm not really worried, but I do have moments of panic. How will we be able to do this? Will it all work out? Will we ever be able to buy a house in the area up there that I like? *sigh* I just have to trust Him. If He leads you to it, He will lead you through it, right? I'm doing the best I can, and waiting expectantly for everything to fall into place miraculously.

Sick.

2010-04-12T21:11:00.003-05:00

Why is it that every time I get going on a workout routine, and I'm all motivated and excited and have some momentum starting... I get sick or injured? This has happened so many times to me, I'm starting to wonder if working out MAKES me sick.

I feel a lot better today, after about 5 days of being sick, but I have some yuck in my throat that won't go away and it's not conducive to a good, high-intensity workout. I'm trying out the whole PACE thing, but I'd only gotten 3 workouts in before getting sick.

This has been a really bad winter for illness in my house. I think it probably has something to do with babysitting an infant and toddler whose parents both work in the medical field. All kinds of new germs introduced. Yuck.

I'm pretty tired of the cycle of being sick twice a month, though. I hope it stops soon.

Conflicted

2010-04-08T21:40:00.003-05:00

What a day. I'm feeling deeply conflicted about some issues. Pretty sure I know what the answer is, but none of the options are easy. Especially the right one. Choosing do to the right thing over the selfish thing is even harder when the stakes are high. And they are. The only thing that makes it possible is knowing that God is good and faithful and true. I trust him. I have to say, though, "Lord help me with my unbelief."

Random things

2010-04-07T22:34:00.002-05:00

Don't you hate it when you finally learn someone's phone number, and then they change it? There are precious few phone numbers that I have memorized. I still remember numbers from pre-pubescence - you know, back before cell phones took over memorizing all of our contacts - but since I got my first cell phone in 1998, I have almost never memorized a phone number. I knew my sister's number at one point... just before she changed it. ;) Besides that, I have probably only memorized phone numbers that spell something, i.e. Cox's customer service number: 263-FAST. I've had the same phone number for a long time, and before that my number had the same suffix, different prefix. That was before you could take your cell number with you when you switched providers. Yes, kids, there once was such a time.

That reminds me, I recently told my 5 year old that when I was little, we didn't have a microwave. I think she is just starting to grasp the concept of times less technologically advanced than this. I actually remember the day my parents bought our first microwave. I was probably around my daughter's age. Weird the things we remember, and the things we forget.

I think I'm going to be writing here more. I have been feeling a little cooped-up and isolated lately. It's hard being home all the time. Maybe writing will help. Tim works weird hours, with 2 late nights a week and alternating fridays and saturdays. It makes it hard to take any classes or join any groups because most things just start too early, or are on his late days. I would love to take a class at the local arts center, but the schedule overlaps with Tim's by like 30 minutes :/ I have been wanting to take a jewelry making class for YEARS but the timing has never been right, or I didn't have the money. I'd also love to take an oil painting class. Or learn to play the violin. Or learn another language. :)

I must be crazy. Maybe I'm just bored. I love to learn new things, though. I have never painted with oils. I've done watercolors and a lot of acrylics, but never oils. I speak un poco Espanol from taking Spanish 1 and 2 in 8th and 9th grades. I can't read music or play any instruments. I think it would be fun to do any of those things, but when you have little kids at home - all the time - it's hard to carve out time for that. I could use some adult-interaction, though, and something that is just about me.

I think my biggest problem is that I have too many interests. There are so many things I want to do that I never end up committing to one and sticking with it long enough to really accomplish anything.

Ok, I'm gonna go watch basketball now. I feel better. :)

Surprise

2010-04-07T11:54:00.004-05:00

I was surprised this morning by a hug goodbye and an "I love you" from my husband. Usually... almost always... if I'm asleep when he leaves for work, he just tries not to wake me as he goes. Even in my half-asleep state, I was caught so off-guard that I sort of posed my "I love you, too" as a question. lol

He used to do that all the time, back in our first year or so of marriage. He said he stopped when we had Jace because he didn't want to wake the baby. It's been a long time since we had a baby sleeping with us, though. Wonder what is going through his head today. Maybe he was just happy that I covered him with the blanket this morning when it was freezing in our room. I'm probably way over-thinking it, but it was really out of the ordinary for me. Er... for him. I do that kind of thing all the time. I'm just more openly affectionate than he is.

Maybe someone has been praying. Thank you, if you have, if you're reading this.

ahhhh change feels good.

2010-04-03T22:57:00.003-05:00

Tonight, I decided to liberate myself from 8 inches of unwanted hair. It feels so good to be rid of it! No pictures of the new 'do yet, but I dig it. I might have my mom trim it up a little more. I was trying to be conservative (relatively speaking), and leave a little extra for the inevitable corrective trimming. Oh... didn't I mention...? I cut it myself. I'm sure the back is crooked as heck, but my hair is wavy (which covers a multitude of sins) and it's good enough for a day or two til I can get to my mom's.

I feel so free! I know it is just a hair cut, but I have kept my hair long for years now, and not purely due to my preference, so cutting it off after dozens of fought-off impulses to do so, really feels great.

Maybe it's a mini mid-life crisis I'm going through, but I just needed a change, and I kind of feel like reclaiming myself from the heap of pseudo-identity that taking on different roles in life has created. I think I'm crawling out of something like apathy.

Besides shedding the mane, I've started working out again. I'm sick of the fatness, and I'm kicking it to the curb. I just finished reading P.A.C.E. : The 12 Minute Fitness Revolution, and tonight, completed my first PACE workout. It felt awesome! I dusted off my high-end rebounder that I had stashed under a bed for at least a year, and did my first high-intensity interval routine. I really like how it feels, and I can't wait to start seeing results. Bye bye, aerobics. Bye bye, fat. :P I realized that I am nearly 30, and if I don't do something about my fatness now, I'm going to get really old really fast. I want to be healthy at 40, not fat and tired and sickly. I'm optimistic about this new program. :) Finding myself wishing I had a stationary bike, though.

Tomorrow may be a monumental day for my family. I asked Tim if I could take the kids to church for Easter, and he eventually settled on coming with us so he can watch them in their class, so they won't be "alone". He doesn't trust anyone with the kids. I assured him that the risk of anything happening to them in that environment is very low, but he insists. Fine with me. Maybe he'll learn something in Sunday School. :) I'm just hoping everyone gets up tomorrow without much trouble. This will be the very first trip to church for the kids, and the first time Tim has gone since we had the kids. Of course, he won't be in the room for the sermon, but oh well. God is good, and he can use anything for his glory. Amen.

who am I?

2010-03-20T05:52:00.003-05:00

After being up all night listening to my pandora station, and having drafted a very nasty blog post (and having the restraint not to publish it), I've finally come back to understanding that my worth is in Christ. God made me who I am and gave me the things that are special about me for a reason.

I am who I am. I am who I have always been. I am also unrecognizable from myself 10 years ago. If, 10 years ago, I were asked to give a description of myself, it may have gone something like this (not holding back):

Fun, cheery, goofy, artsy, spontaneous, caring, cuddly, generous, giggly, smiles easily, lazy, night-owl, crazy, happy, and last but definitely not least, a Christian.

Today I would have to scratch at least half of those, and add in some toned-down, and sadder descriptions. :/

What the heck? Granted, when I was 18, I still needed a lot of growing up, but why did grown-up have to translate into totally-different-acting-person? I can add temperate to the list, which is good, and I have more wisdom and perspective now. I'm a mother and a wife. I think the problem is that I have tried too hard to adapt... or to accommodate Tim, and I've almost ceased being who I was when he met me. Not sure how he feels about that, but I sure do miss me.

It was great to hear David Crowder's How He Loves Us come up on my station. I love the visual of being tossed around like a tree in a hurricane. It gives me this mental picture of a tree standing all alone, being blown back and forth and all around, and everything else around it is obscured. I love it.

Perspective really changes things. Seeing who I am in God helps me see past what anyone else thinks... including myself. How wonderful it is to be accepted for me. That's what we crave so much from those around us. We want acceptance. We want to be valued, to be special to someone. At least that is what I want. I don't want to hear that I'm good at something or talented, or anything of that sort. I want to hear that I'm special. That I'm irreplaceable. I just heard Third Day's I Got You.

"...What kind of day do you wanna bring to me?
Rain or shine, that will be just fine

'cause i got everything i need
I got everything, i got everything.

I got you, and you're putting it all together
And it doesnt get any better as far as i can tell
And i got you, right now and ever after
And it doesn't even really matter that i got nothing else
'cause i got you ..."

And thank God that I have Him. I'm special to Him if to no one else in the whole world. It's things like this that make me want to fall on my face and praise God, and thank Him for loving me, and for being all I need. Doesn't matter if I'm funny or stuffy, artsy or boring, I'm just me and he loves me as his child.

I still miss some things about the younger me, and I think I will try to get some of that back. Not sure how successful I will be, but I'm gonna try.

The Shack RETRACTION

2010-03-03T11:29:00.002-06:00

In my previous blog post, I mentioned that in The Shack, Jesus is called a liar. This was a mistake on my part. I misread the line which actually said he had been lied TO, not that he had lied. This misconception had a lot to do with my violent reaction to this book.

After realizing my mistake, I felt it necessary to re-visit my previous review. I stand by my previous criticism of the writer's skill (someone hand him a thesaurus, please), and the over-use of church-isms, and my distaste for making Papa into a jolly, fat woman who uses a lot of improper English; however, I can overlook these things as a matter more of preference than anything else.

I know that in the book, it is explained that Papa being as "she" is, is to get beyond Mack's stereotypical idea of what God the Father looks like. I still don't like it, but I get what he was after. I just don't like calling the Father "she".

Anyway, I just wanted to put this out here. As my friend, Miriam pointed out, the scene with Sophia is an interesting take on what it means to judge. There are some good elements in the book, just not sold on it yet.

We are Platypus, The Shack and Pandora

2010-03-02T12:19:00.007-06:00

So I found this awesome shirt:

It's awesome, you know it. I want to order it, but they run small and I like a more relaxed fit in my shirts, so I will have to wait til I lose a little weight, I think. Makes an awesome reward to myself, though, dontcha think?

In other news, I am almost done reading The Shack, by William P. Young. I have about 50 or 60 pages left, I think, and I just want to make my recommendation right now, feeling completely safe in trusting that the final pages will have no redeeming qualities powerful enough to change my mind. If you believe in the God of the Bible, this book isn't for you. God has revealed himself to us through His holy Word, and through creation. Let this overly-liberated fairy tale be overlooked if you're looking for a clearer picture of our Lord. Aside from the mediocre-at-best writing, I believe this book is a dangerous portrayal of who God is and how he interacts with his creation. Sure, there are elements of truth in the story, but have you ever heard the analogy of a glass of pure water with a drop of poison in it? That tiny drop make the whole glass deadly, and no matter how pure the rest of the water was, don't drink it.

I know a lot of people love this book. It doesn't surprise me. It seems like a book that Oprah might like, (with all it's compromising spiritualism and gushy lovey, feel-good, jolly god-ness) and lots of people love Oprah. If I'm mistaken, please accept my apology, Oprah.

I'm sure there are many reviews out there that address all of the conflicts with the Word of God, so I will not go any deeper. Pages 183 and 184 were enough for me to close the book and debate ever opening it again. To call Jesus a liar (see retraction post to follow) and to imply that being a Christian is a bad thing, and that Jesus is somehow present in all world religions... that was the final straw.

I was uncomfortable with Papa being a big black woman with poor grammar who just cooks and eats all day, with Sophia - supposedly Papa's wisdom personified (???) , and Jesus being a big dopey guy who seems to have nothing to do but skip rocks on a lake, but that was the nail in the coffin. This book will do nothing but water down the truth about God, heaven, judgment, and hell, and watered-down truth is no longer truth.

Discernment is a gift that God has given us. Use it. Ugh. This book really makes me mad. I half want to finish it so I can finish my review, and I half want to throw it away and not subject my mind to what is written on the final pages. Things can be hard to forget. I'm still thinking about it.

My pastor uses a term, "high-truth". I think I fall into that category. I just don't have much tolerance for lies, and this is compounded when we're talking about God and the Bible. I know that people need the truth. Satan is the father of lies, and I want no part of that. Lies keep people complacent, believing that they are ok, that God is jolly and all forgiveness and their version of love. That there is no penalty for sin, that hell is just for murderers and rapists. God hates sin. He doesn't wink at sin. What we do matters. We need a savior!

Anyway, I'm off my soap box for now. For now. ;)

What else? Oh yeah! Pandora! Pandora is pretty awesome. You pick some artists and they pick similar music for you, and you can tell them if you like each song or not to help tailor their other choices for you. LOVE IT! I think it's brilliant! I put in a couple artists and the ones they picked for me were perfect, and 90% of them were other artists that I listen to! Amazing! So if you would like to see what I'm listening to, check out my Pandora station.

On second thought, it's kinda creepy that they are that good at predicting what I like. And kind of neat that people are so universal. We all feel like freaks sometimes, but apparently we're alike enough for our musical tastes to be figured out by a computer. Hm, that's something I'll probably give some more thought to. Interesting.

Oh, and going back a week, our beautiful couch would not fit through the door to our apartment. lol... so after 2 days of looking elsewhere for another couch (we thought we had already eliminated all other couches at Slumberland), we ended up back at Slumberland, and ordered another, smaller couch plus a big ottoman. Tim thought the ottoman was stupid, but I want to have the extra room to lounge around, since the couch is smaller -- plus it was half-off, so we got it. I think he'll like it once he uses it. Even if he doesn't, that just means I won't have to share it :)

Alrighty, enough of the blog for now. Time to get off my bootay and get a workout in so I can get my platypus shirt! *Spish Spish Spish* :) That's that sound a platypus makes. <3

Winter, winter, everywhere.

2010-02-23T18:36:00.007-06:00

I'm so tired of Winter. I have been ready for it to end since December 26th. We've had a cold one this year, and I'm so ready for the sun to shine again. Growing up in sunny Northern California, we didn't really have winters, though I hear that has changed recently. *shakes fist at climate*

I haven't updated this blog in so long, there are a few random things that really have nothing to do with each other that I should post about. In December, for instance, Tim and I got to experience our long-time dream of going to a Celtics game! That was so much fun!

We saw the Celtics in OKC, and thankfully, they beat the Thunder. We got lucky with the tickets. I had signed up on the Thunder's web site back when they first formed a couple years ago, and I got a call out of the blue from them just before the Celtics game. The individual tickets to that game were all sold out but they had some in packages. We bought a package of 8 games at $10 a ticket, and they upgraded our Celtics tickets to a VIP lounge for free. We got to stay in the official Thunder suite... which was a little awkward since we were decked out in green >:)

I was so excited to be there, I must have been beaming because this usher (an older gentlemen who moonlights there from his photography day-job) tried to guess how long Tim and I had been married, and thought we were still relatively newlyweds. This summer will make 9 years. It was a really fun experience, and I can't wait to go again next year. We've decided to splurge on some closer seats next year, if possible.

Then came Christmas, which was pretty uneventful, as far as I can remember. I honestly have no memory of what anyone gave or got this year, except for the PS3 I waited in line for on Black Friday for like 4 hours. My mom and I got up at like 2 am and headed to a remote Wal-Mart and went nuts with the rest of the loons that had the same idea. It was super fun, and we got lots of good deals... but mostly it was just fun.

In January I decided to get a new bird. Sadly, after finding a breeder, my little Java finch, Max died. I miss that little bugger so much. I'm hoping to get another Java at the spring bird fair at the extension office. He was so cool. He died in my hands. :( This is Max on my step-mom's head. He loved to fly over and visit with us and our visitors if they stayed long enough.

The new bird I was after was a lineolated parakeet. They're difficult to locate around here so I had to find an out-of-state breeder. The first lady I contacted had a clutch but after I place my deposit, she had an ice storm knock out her power and all the babies got chilled and died.

The only other breeder in the area that had birds ready to go was in Dallas. I pretty much gave up the idea of getting one until my sister said "Lets drive and get it!". My sister is awesome. My mom, sister and I drove all the way to Dallas (6 hours each way) and back to get my little bird, Phoebe. I love road trips. It was so great to spend that time with my mom and sister. Here we are in the car on the way to Dallas.

Phoebe is still new here, but so far she is the quietest bird I have ever met. She's pretty shy still, but mostly just with hands. She's ok to be on you, but doesn't like hands. I'm working with her to get past that, but it is slow coming. Here's a picture of Phoebe on the car ride home.

Anyway, that brings us about up to speed. Oh, except that thanks to Uncle Sam, we paid off our credit card debt, and purchased a new couch, TV and TV console! Super excited about the couch! The one I have is ugly - it was to start with when it was brand new - OLD, and broken. The new one arrives this Saturday! YAY! *does a happy couch dance*

I'll post pictures of the new stuff when the couch gets here.

There. Blog updated. Seacrest out. ;)

What a trip!

2009-10-31T11:47:00.006-05:00

Whew... vacations can be crazy. Just got back from a trip to Disney World with my husband's work. We had a good time, the hotel was beautiful, the entire Disney property was beautiful, but there are not enough hours in a week to do all I wanted to do out there. We did a lot of walking and a little waiting in steamy 90 degree weather with probably 90% humidity. Record breaking highs for Orlando this time of year, I'm told.

It's nice to get away with Tim once in a while. I'm so glad I have my parents to watch the kids. I never worry about them when I'm gone because I know my mom will take excellent care of them. They made it through the week with only a bruised cheek on my dare-devil daughter. Pretty good considering how crazy she can be.

I'm so glad to be home, but the return trip was not an easy one. I got so little sleep on my "vacation", and was surrounded with hacking-coughing kids whose parents seem oblivious to the concept of teaching your children to cover their mouths. You should have seen the 3 year old girl on the shuttle from the airport to the resort. She was standing in front of her seat, next to her spaced-out, blank-faced mother hacking and coughing on the arm of the lady in front of her the whole 30 minute trip. The mom never once even motioned to the girl to cover her mouth or sit down or anything. The older lady in front (with the spit-on arm) kept turning around in disbelief, trying to glare a plea to the mother to contain her child's spittle, to absolutely no avail. When that lady left the bus, the offending child switched to our aisle of seats, and our whole party moved WAY back on the bus. What is wrong with people? I've traveled with kids before. It's hard, but they're YOUR kids, don't make them everyone else's problem. Unreal.

9lb lemons in the hydroponic gardens in Epcot!

So, my point is that I ended up with a cold. It started to hit me in Atlanta on my extended-lay over on the way home. My flight from Orlando left the gate late because of a security issue. There was a scary looking dude in a black, ankle-length tunic/gown talking on a hands-free cell phone thing at our gate prior to boarding. Before boarding, 3 TSA agents showed up to run a security check for our aircraft. They checked "random" ID's as we boarded, and when they showed up, Scary Dude took off to another gate, said something to some lady and then disappeared. I was glad to see him go. It sucked to miss my connecting flight because of the delay, but that's better than the alternative! There was also some anti-terrorist support agent on my flight. I have mixed feelings about the whole thing. For one, I am comforted by the diligence of the agencies we rely on to keep us safe, but on the other hand, that was scary. Ignorance is bliss, as they say. That was too in-your-face for me, even if there was no real threat. It reminded me of the real threats that are out there.

So I arrived in the huge Atlanta airport 10 minutes before my connection departed, and didn't make it in time to board. I got placed on stand-by for another flight about 4 hours later, and thankfully made it on that plane. I was sooo tired by this time. Disney's Magical Express shuttles you to the airport 3 hours before your flight, so I started my day very early, and had almost no sleep. I made it home, though, and got some sleep last night. Tim is actually in the air on his way home as I type. I hope he's having a better trip than I did. I know he was having a hard time finding gum to chew on the plane since they don't sell gum on Disney property, but they sell it at the airport, so he should be ok.

Anyway, I know I haven't said much about the actual Disney trip, but there just isn't much to tell. It was a lot of walking, not a lot of actual doing. It wasn't particularly relaxing or exciting. It was fun, though.

By the way, the Disney employees were deightful, with the exception of the waiters. The waiters were awful, but the rest of the staff, from the bus drivers to the housekeepers to the sales people and ride operators, they were all cheerful, helpful and seemed very sincere. Delta needs some Disney training.

Hopes and Dreams

2009-10-14T23:36:00.002-05:00

So much is up in the air right now, I'm going a little batty. We're trying to buy our first house, and the process has been an emotional roller-coaster already, and there is still a long way to go. Hoping to close before the tax rebate cut-off of December 1st. We will hear more in a day or two, and I don't want to write too much til then. Just praying everything works out. :)

Michael Jackson

2009-07-07T23:52:00.002-05:00

When I first heard about Michael Jackson's death, I didn't feel anything. I was more moved by the passing of Billy Mays a couple days later. I guess I thought of MJ as kind of a weirdo; an eccentric personality more than a person. I caught some of his memorial service on TV at Jace's speech therapy in the waiting room today.

A day or two after MJ died, I was talking to my husband about how sad it was to me that he had risen to high to fame and yet was so unhappy. He obviously had self-image issues, amid a lot of other issues including pain medication addiction. I felt so sad that his life never turned back around; he never worked it all out. I wanted a happy ending like in your typical, satisfying, American movie. His life seemed to stop mid-story, and it left me with an empty, let-down feeling like the power went out at the movie theater at the height of the conflict of the film. You get your refund and go on with life but it's so abrupt, like stepping off a curb that was higher than you anticipated.

When a famous person dies, we all tend to mourn. I don't know why this is. I wasn't a huge fan of Michael Jackson at any point in my life. I wasn't alive when he was the adorable little boy in the Jackson 5. For about half of my life, he had been a very strange person to me, and hadn't produced much music.

I cried for like 3 days when the Crocodile Hunter died. I know why on that one. I felt so bad for his wife and kids. Steve Erwin was such a huge, larger-than-life personality... I just couldn't imagine anyone ever being able to even begin to fill the hole in their lives that he left when he died. Sudden, tragic, bizarre death. I was truly sad, not for my loss, but for his family's loss.

For Michael Jackson, I am really sad for him and for his family. Like I said, I really wish MJ would have lived to resolve his issues and find peace in the Lord, Jesus Christ. For his family, his brothers and sisters, and more than anything for his children who have no mother. 11 year old Paris, talking about how wonderful of a father he was to her... I just know nothing will be able to replace him to her. She was clearly Daddy's girl. And then seeing Prince Michael II clutching a Michael Jackson doll on stage. Broke my heart.

It broke my heart and brought to the surface my own greatest fears: That I will die before my children are grown. Since Tim is not a believer, I think about what my early death would mean to my kids. I stay home and home school them, they don't go to church... all the things that would change in their lives if I were gone. I pray constantly that God will allow me to live long enough to raise them. I cherish every moment with them and every opportunity I have to lead them to a relationship with Jesus so their sins may be forgiven when they are morally mature.

I don't know if Michael Jackson was a believer. I don't know that for sure about anyone but myself, but I pray that the glory of God will shine through this tradegty and that many souls will be saved as a result. I pray for comfort for the Jackson family and especially the kids. May they be blessed and come to a full knowledge of Jesus Christ. Amen.

8 years.... 4 of 'em wonderful!

2009-06-30T17:10:00.004-05:00

Today is my 8th wedding anniversary! I went and met Tim for lunch. I love my honey, he's my best friend and aside from the fact that he occasionally drives me nuts, I couldn't ask for a better husband. He always makes me laugh, even when I'm mad at him, and he's a great father to our children.

Our marriage wasn't an instant success, and it wasn't easy getting to where we are now, but I would do it all again in an instant to have him as my husband and best buddy like I do now. And I'd do my part a lot better the second time around. The more time I spend around other people, the more I treasure him. I thank God for Tim, even though Tim doesn't yet know the Lord, I can see God working in his life. I pray continually for the day that Tim will be reconciled with his Maker.

To anyone out there who happens upon this blog and doesn't have a blissful marriage, I cannot recommend the book Created to be His Help Meet strongly enough. The God-given wisdom that Debi Pearl has passed down in this book has transformed my heart and attitude toward my husband and marriage. We're very much in love now, which I could never have honestly said in the early years of our marriage. You don't have to agree with everything that is said in the book in order to benefit from the Biblical wisdom that is contained between its covers. God has redeemed my broken marriage to an unbelieving (still) man. Let Him be praised!

Butterflies, Science and Fish

2009-06-16T17:28:00.017-05:00

Well, our butterflies all emerged from their little chrysalis homes, and 3 of them successfully flew away. One of the butterflies had what looked like 2 proboscises (straw like mouth thingy) and they were kinda freaky, each going its own way and neither would curl up properly like the rest of the butterflies. Another one got injured in the release process. Neither of them could fly, so I just placed them up in a tree and let nature take it's course. Bummer. The other 3 flew off into the tree tops and the kids were happy with the experience. What a wondrous thing to witness. :)

We had to release them last week because we were going on vacation! Yay! I love vacation! We went to Oklahoma City's Science Museum on Saturday and then to the Aquarium in Tulsa (er Jenks to be precise) on Sunday. We all had a great time. I can't wait for our next trip! Not sure where we will go, but I hope we go somewhere before too long. I really enjoyed doing things as a family.
The Science Museum was lots of fun, but if you happen to visit, skip the cartoony Imax movie about bugs in space... it was just awful. I also could have skipped the Science Live show we went to and been no worse for wear, though it wasn't bad, it was LOUD, and Jace had to turn his hearing aids off in order to tolerate it, which means he didn't learn anything, anyway. Rachel liked it, though.

The aquarium was neat, but short. It only takes about an hour to see everything and take 350 pictures (trust me). The special lighting made it difficult to get good snap shots with my camera, so I deleted about a hundred of the ones I took. Yay for huge memory cards and extra batteries!

See huge alligator gar to the left, opening it's mouth right by Jace's head, lol.

One of the highlights of the trip for the kids was running through the dancing fountain at the River Walk next to the aquarium. They got thoroughly wet and had a blast. Only problem was that this caused an unforeseen shortage of clothing for the kids, which got a little sticky when we had a bladder control issue on the ride home from Tulsa. We managed, though, and as I said before, the kids totally loved it, so it was worth the trouble. Note to self: bring lots of pants next time.

Tulsa is really pretty. At least the east side where we stayed is really pretty this time of year. Big, expensive houses in hilly, established neighborhoods with big trees and manicured lawns. Wonder what that is like... *sigh* It was very pretty. Wichita is UGLY. Ughly. Ughhhhly. It's flat and there are only trees near water, which is muddy, polluted and scarce, except when it rains buckets and everything floods. THEN the water is everywhere. It's in your dining room in the carpet because a pipe on the roof came loose from it's seal. It's in your basement because the ground is saturated. It's blocking streets, creeping up hills and ominously looming just outside of houses. I digress. Tulsa is pretty, but driving in Tusla is awful.

One thing I was thankful for when we got back to Wichita was the street signs. In Wichita you get advance notice of upcoming exits. Usually you get 3 signs warning of a junction or even just a regular off-ramp onto a city street. In Tulsa you get 1 sign and it's about 300 feet before the exit. We had to turn around 3 or 4 times just getting across Tulsa because we missed our exits! Ugh. Never again. I told Tim we should get ourselves a GPS for Christmas.

/J/.../J/...Jumping up and down in speech therapy

2009-06-09T19:01:00.003-05:00

I am so excited! Today was Jace's first appointment with his new speech therapist. The hospital has been trying to hire a full-time pediatric speech pathologist for about 6 months and they finally got one! Jace LOVES Miss Caitlyn! She's very animated and up-beat and the woman knows her stuff! I am SO thankful.

I knew things weren't really jiveing with the last pathologist, but it was free and our best option at the time. Miss Caitlyn read a story with him and got him to say some parts of the story back to her to evaluate him, and she was really surprised at how well his /r/ and /l/ sounds were, since these were the sounds we were most-recently working on at home. She noticed his /j/ sound sound was coming out a lot like /z/. She modeled a correct /j/ for him and he picked it up really quickly. He was struggling with not making the /z/ sound at first, but he was self-correcting when he said it incorrectly. Miss Caitlyn seemed impressed.

She pulled out some cards with words from the story they read together and taught him about syllables. Then she gave us some cards with single-syllable /j/ words to practice at home and gave me some ideas on how to make it fun. We also need to get /ch/ down still, but, apparently /ch/ is the same as /j/ but without vocal involvement. Miss Caitlyn said once he gets /j/, the /ch/ will come easily.

I'm just so thankful. We only have about 12 or so appointments left, but I think it will be enough. God is good and He provides all we need. Amen!

Rent

2009-06-05T15:45:00.002-05:00

Rent bites. I hate paying rent. I've been itching to buy a house for years. Our apartment is small and we don't even have a patio for the kids to play on. We've stayed here our entire marriage because it has been cheap, but I got a notice this morning that the rent will be going up again on August 1st.

I'm praying that we can qualify for (and find) a humble house to buy. We don't make a lot of money, but I'm not incredibly picky. I would be happy with an older house in a relatively quiet neighborhood with a few key features. I prayed for God to provide me the right church (with a few key features) and He did, so I am going to pray for Him to provide us a house, too.

I'm praying for a house (cheaper than our rent) with a basement (for safety in tornado season), a fenced back yard (because Rache' would spend all day outside if she could), 2 toilets (trust me), 3 bedrooms + (2 kids), central air, and non-carpeted floors would be nice (for Tim's allergies), as would a garage ('cause who likes scraping windows?), but not absolutely necessary.

God has always been good to me, and He's got cattle on a thousand hills, right? His will be done, and I will happily accept whatever situation we end up in, but this is my prayer. Praise the Lord!

Working Moms

2009-06-05T15:00:00.003-05:00

My mom was a stay at home mom. My mom was also a working mom. I was homeschooled for several years, and I was also publicly and privately educated for many years.

My mom was a great mom and she was very involved in our lives. I hated being a latchkey kid when she was working. I'm not saying that a working mom is bad or absent. Stay at home moms, especially if the kids are home, are around their kids more than working moms. This doesn't mean that stay at home moms are by default good mothers, nor are homeschooling moms. It's very difficult to express my thankfulness for my situation without offending those in different situations, especially when it touches on emotional subjects, like family.

I have very few friends who are stay at home moms, and far fewer who homeschool. I have reasons for the sacrifices our family makes so I can be home with the kids, and they home with me. My husband isn't a Christian. My kids aren't allowed to attend church. My son wears hearing aids and can't hear well in noisy environments like a kindergarten classroom. He also has a speech and language delay. These things plus public school would equate to a bright child at the bottom of his class who can't effectively communicate with his peers and would be taught godlessness and humanism by everyone except his mother for the few hours I would see him each evening.

I am not a very maternal person. I don't like babies. I don't really like children. I love my children, and I know my ultimate responsibility as a mother is to train them up in the way they should go. "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth" (III John 4).

My plan, when I had Jace, was to go back to work when he went to school (and then when I had Rachel, I added a year to that). I went back to school, I was ready to go back to work, but we found out about Jace's disability. Public school just isn't the best option for him. I didn't want to homeschool, but I spent the entire Fall and Summer before Jace started school researching and praying. The answer to my prayers was clear.

To the working mothers, and all other mothers out there, I do not know what is right for you. You can be a fantastic mother and work, or a crappy one. You can be a fantastic mother and stay home or you can be a crappy one that your children wish didn't stay home. I'm just trying to be obedient to the voice of my Master. I didn't mean to offend anyone in my zeal for master meatball recipes and cheap laundry detergent. I will look over my original post again and see if maybe I worded some things poorly. I was really just happy to find a site to help me learn and teach my daughter how to run a household and save money (which we need to do on one income). I figured someone would probably take offense, but my reasons for my choices are legitimate, and I would have to pretend they aren't in order to not offend someone.

When I speak of my life, I'm not criticizing you for your choices, I am simply thanking God for my life, for His help, His guidance and provision. Sorry for rambling, my thoughts aren't always organized.

I also have to say that I do believe it is best for children to have their mothers at home (as long as the mother isn't a terrible, abusive mother). No one else has as vested an interest in their child's success, well-being and happiness. No one. I know not everyone can stay home, but I do believe it is the best thing for young children. I know that will ruffle some feathers, but it is a harsh reality I had to face before I committed to staying home, myself.

Reminds me of the lyrics of a song:
"promises are only mercenary troops. They bear no real allegiance to the soil. When they fight they always look around. They have never really been in touch with the ground..."

Teachers, day care providers, therapists, paras, non of them are about your child's success like you do. They do their job because it is their job, and many do it well, but none of them have your child as the highest priority.

The Lost Art of Homemaking

2009-06-04T18:15:00.003-05:00

On one of my internet bunny-trails (meaning I don't remember how I got there, or from where) I stumbled upon this site: FutureChristianHomemakers.com and I was reading through some of the lessons. I am SO excited about going through them with Rachel when she's a couple years older! I would love to start up a FCH group in my area, but even if that doesn't work out, it will be great to incorporate these things into our school days, as a sort of home ec.

I wish I had learned more when I was young. I had to pick things up as I went, which resulted in a lot more work, less tasty food, and messier house. My parents got divorced when I was 8, so my mom had to go to work. Plus, being a child of the 80's, homemaking as a "career" choice wasn't very popular. At the height of women's lib, homemaking was viewed as demeaning and undesirable. I didn't grow up planning to be a homemaker, but I am so thankful to God that I am one. I want to be the best homemaking wife and mother that I can be, and I hope someday Rachel will get to be a homemaker, too. I'm glad that women have the rights to have careers outside the home. I'm glad for our status in society that was brought about by women's lib, but I believe, when you have children at home, it's best to be there for them. This is part of why I homeschool... it all flows from the same source: I want to be the one to raise my children. My own, personal convictions keep me home (that and God's great mercy and grace), but I don't expect everyone to. I don't even expect Rachel to, but I hope she does.

Road trip!

2009-06-03T17:03:00.003-05:00

I'm itching for a road trip this Summer. The kids are old enough, now, to be able to make it to the next restroom without having an accident in the car, and they're mature enough to appreciate some of the neato things you see on a road trip - and remember them.

I have several destinations in mind, but in reality, we will probably only make it to 1 or 2 this Summer. Money is an issue. I 'd like to take the kids to see the Oklahoma Aquarium in Tulsa, and the Science Museum in Oklahoma City. Then there is a really cool petting zoo at a bed and breakfast in Nickerson, Kansas. They have all kinds of exotic animals that you can get up-close and personal with at a reasonable price. Rachel keeps asking if she can ride a horse, and I think they have pony rides there, too.

In the recent past I have strongly objected to long road-trips (sorry, Honey), but my views have really changed, lately. I think it has been a combination of seeing photos from other people's trips, and seeing my children's curiosity bloom from doing things hands-on. I'm also starting to remember the road-side attractions that my family visited on long road trips when I was a child. Someday I hope to take them to places I remember, like the Giant Redwood Forest in northern California. Everyone should see those trees in person before they die.

Since we homeschool, we can take these trips whenever we want and make a lesson plan out of it, but I like to have Tim go, so we have to work around his work schedule. I wouldn't want to take the kids without him, it's just not right making memories without Daddy.

On a side-note, all of my caterpillars have morphed into chrysalids, and will be butterflies in about a week! Isn't that cool? The appearance of their shells changes every day. The kit says they will get darker and darker, and I have noticed some new, iridescent spots on them! What incredible little creatures God has made for us to marvel at! I had a hard time picking up the iridescence with the camera, but you can see it a little in the goldish spikey things. Very scientific description, there.
Here you can see them in their "Butterfly Habitat" enclosure. Don't forget to click on the pictures to enlarge them for detail! They're really neat!

Update on butterflies

2009-06-01T16:25:00.003-05:00

Just this morning my caterpillars were all fat, fuzzy and mobile. This afternoon, 3 of the 5 are chrysalids! I tried to get some good pictures, but my camera battery died, so I will try to get more later on. Maybe the other 2 will have transformed by then!

Transformation

2009-06-01T13:46:00.006-05:00

Two new updates:
1. Our painted lady butterfly larvae are getting fat and ready to transform. They're starting to hang upside down, which means they will be forming chrysalids soon. Here are some pictures from May 28th and from today (June 1st). Look how much bigger they have gotten!

The 2nd update is that my Central Park Hoodie is almost complete. I have finished the back, fronts, and sleeves. I blocked the back a while ago and am blocking 2 of the other 4 pieces right now, but I ran out of pins, so I have to wait to do the other 2 when these ones are dry. I really hope it fits. I will be able to sort of try it on once the blocking is done. I wish I could find my other box of pins. Here are some pictures of the front panels and sleeves, blocking and pre-blocking (the unblocked pieces are lying on top of the blocking pieces in the first pic):

For those who don't knit, blocking is a technique that usually involves getting a piece of knitted fabric wet, pinning it to the desired shape, and allowing it to dry. This relaxes the fabric, helps even out the stitches, and in natural fibers, it can help set the shape. My yarn for this sweater is only 20% wool, 80% acrylic, so I don't think blocking will do much to hold the shape, but it did give the fabric a nice drape, evened out my stitches and made it "grow" to the correct dimensions. Can't wait for this to be done! All I have left to knit is the hood and button band! Woo hoo!

Birdius Maximus

2009-05-30T20:13:00.003-05:00

We have a 3 year old Java sparrow named Max. Max is possibly the coolest pet that I have ever had... and I have had a lot of pets. I found him at a pet store when he was a baby. He sang at me every time I walked by, and he had such a pretty song, I had to get him. I had no idea that a little finch would be so animated and interactive. He loves us, especially the kids.

We let him fly free in the house sometimes, and he usually flitters from one of our heads to another or from shoulder to shoulder. He also likes to sleep on top of the DVD rack, which is about the highest point in the apartment that he could easily sit on.

He's such a little lover, but he doesn't like hands. He will hop around on the floor and nearly get flattened because he has no healthy fear of feet, but bring your hand within a couple feet of him and he flies away, squawking in protest. This is probably because I have to periodically catch him to trim his toe nails.

His favorite place to sit is on Jace's shoulder when he's doing school work. I have included a picture for your enjoyment. He also likes to sleep on my shoulder while I knit. I guess he likes the repetitive motion.

Homeschooler Speech Therapy Goldmine!

2009-05-30T06:13:00.003-05:00

Jace has moderate to moderately-severe sensory-neuro hearing loss in both ears, and wasn't diagnosed until he was 4, so he has only had his hearing aids for about a year and a half. His speech and language were delayed (about a year behind) when we started speech and language therapy at the local hospital on a grant from their charitable foundation.

Jace has made huge advances in his speech and language since then, but we knew from the start that we had a very limited number of visits, after which our insurance will not cover his therapy. Because of this limitation, the pathologist has worked with me, spacing out his sessions to every 2 weeks and giving me lots of instruction and homework to practice with Jace to get the most bang for our buck.

We're over half way through with our free sessions, and while Jace has made awesome progress, he still needs a lot of fine-tuning and there are some sounds we haven't gotten to yet. He started out omitting a lot of sounds and substituting for many of the sounds he did attempt to say. I sit in on all of his therapy sessions and we practice at home, daily. I feel confident that we will be able to continue at home with no problem once his sessions are used up at the hospital. He's a smart kid and he wants to do well with his speech.

I woke up, again, at about 4:50 am today and couldn't get back to sleep because of the congestion from this endless cold. I had something in my inbox from The Old Schoolhouse magazine that was about speech and language therapy options for homeschoolers. This got me started on one of my Google bunny trails, and I happened upon a web site that is just FULL of resources!

If you are looking for home speech and language therapy resources, free on the web, you have to check this site out. Be warned: there are a ton of links to sift through, but I have found some incredibly useful information on their list, already. I haven't even scratched the surface.

This one is really helpful for training specific sounds:
http://speech-language-therapy.com/tx-facts-and-tricks.html
This looks promising, some useful ideas:
http://www.speechpathology.com/schoolBased/toolTips.asp
And some more freebies:
http://www.speech-language-therapy.com/freebies.htm
Another site with some creative ideas for building speech:
http://www.speechtx.com/language.htm

I'm so happy to have found this goldmine of resources! Praise God! I felt confident enough about continuing before, but now I feel equipped for the job. I found a worksheet for eliciting the "ch" sound, which is awesome because as of yet, Jace has always used "sh" instead. I can't wait to try it out with him! They explained that "ch" is basically "t" plus "sh" so you can sometimes get a kid to say it by putting a word ending in "t" before a word starting with "sh" (ie wet shoes = choose) <3 the internet

If I hadn't been a mother

2009-05-29T05:14:00.003-05:00

I can't sleep, so I thought I would try to blog some of the thoughts that are bouncing around in my head instead of lying awake coughing in bed.

If I hadn't been a mother, I might have been an anthropologist, or an archeologist or some other type of -ologist. I have a thirst for learning. I love to study new things, learn new skills, and fill my head with mostly-useless knowledge.

I think I get that from my dad. He spent most of my childhood and adolescence dragging me around to various historical sites in California and surrounding areas, and sharing a wealth of mostly-useless, however interesting factoids about the world around us. My dad has a love for learning.

My mom inherited a propensity for research from her mother; I inherited it from her. Combine the love of mostly-useless facts with a natural tendency to obsessively research, and you get someone like me. I am fascinated with the world around me, the people around me, the nature of things on a whole.

Any time I plan to make a major purchase, I research obsessively until I have narrowed it down to the "best" apparent choice, settle on that and then research until I find the best possible place to buy it, considering price, time, distance, customer service, return policy, warranties, etc. I can't imagine how anyone buys a camera or clothes dryer or (God forbid) car, without going through this process. Seriously.

So I probably would have eventually settled into a career in which on-going research and discovery were required... if I hadn't been a mother.

I grew up not wanting children. I loved animals and had planned on just having lots of pets, but I married the world's most allergic man, so anything with fur is out of the question. A year and a half later I had my son, and then 11 months after that, my daughter. I went to school for a year and even went back to work as an intern for a short time, but I couldn't leave my children. We can survive on Tim's income alone, and nothing I can buy is more important to me than being here to raise my children, myself.

I never expected to be this way. I never thought I would be a stay-at-home mom, much less a homeschooling one. I hated staying home at first, and it has been hard over the years, especially because there were a couple years in which I didn't have a car while Tim was at work. God has richly blessed me with the ability to stay home and teach my children, and I take every day as a gift from His hands. I know that no career, for me, would ever be as important.

I will probably never become an anthropologist or archeologist. I am a mother, a wife, a keeper at home, and a teacher to my children. I hope I can pass on my love of learning to my children, and I pray that they use it to learn to hear and know the Lord's voice, and to go where He directs them.

walk walk walk walk walk... and stuff.

2009-05-26T09:07:00.004-05:00

My friend, Beth and I spent most of last year walking about 2 miles a night, several nights a week... until it got too cold out. We stopped walking together over the winter but have just now picked back up.

We've decided to walk every Monday, Wednesday and Friday evening (around her work and school schedule), which works out great for me since Tim goes into work later on Tuesday and Thursday, so I can walk in the morning those days before he leaves, while the kids are asleep, and it's still cool, but light out.

So far we walked Sunday and Monday, and I walked by myself Monday morning and this morning (Tuesday) so it's going well! I am not a morning person at all, so it's no small wonder that I have gotten up before I had to, 2 days in a row this week to do exercise. EXERCISE! Can you believe it?! ME! lol. I have been praying for God to help me get fit, lose the weight, ya know, and I think the fact that I've been sick and congested this week has helped get me out of bed and out the door. I can't sleep anyway, so might as well walk. So thank you, Lord, for the sniffles!

I'm trying to get past this plateau. Walking is the least torturous form of exercise I can think of, so that's what I'm doing. I also have a new step and step aerobics dvd that I can do when the weather sucks or when I feel like burning a lot of calories, quickly.

On another subject, entirely; I stumbled across a support group in my city for moms using the specific homeschool curriculum that we use! They meet at a local church (that I actually attended as a teenager) so I'm really psyched to hook up with them. In the Summer they only meet once a month, and this month it is today... and I can't make it, but I will make arrangements to go next month. It's so weirdly specific to my needs, I must go. The church also has a Wednesday night service that I am contemplating attending this week, since my church only has Sunday morning services and this church is close to my home. Oh and because I haven't actually shown up for church in a month. That too.

Anyway, I'm planning to go to my mom's today. My kids miss their uncles and grandparents and my dear step-dad generously changes my oil for nothing, and I desperately need an oil change.

I've been knitting the Central Park Hoodie but have slacked off the last several days. I usually knit when I watch TV but there is nothing on TV now. I went to a fabric store to look for buttons for it and they had crap, and it was expensive crap, too. $3 for a button? One button? Really? It's just a plain plastic circle with 2 holes in it. Soo... off to ebay and etsy in search of buttons. Man it's hard to choose buttons. So many possibilities. Good thing I have plenty of time before sweater weather arrives. I will keep looking until something catches my eye.

Anyway I'm off, so much to get done. And I'm hungry.

Sick.

2009-05-25T04:45:00.002-05:00

Tim caught something at work and didn't realize he was actually sick since he's always stuffed up with his allergies. We all ended up drinking after him (he had a delicious frozen coffee drink, and we did not) and one by one we all came down with a yucky cold. The worst part is that this crud seems to want to stick around for WEEKS.

I had to take Rachel to the ER in the middle of the night/wee morning hours because she was all croupy. They gave her steroids since I had already given her a breathing treatment at home. She's doing much better now, but this junky cough just doesn't want to go away.

I hate going to sleep when I'm congested. This is why I am up at 4:30am. That and the Amp I had earlier. In case you're wondering, Amp vs. cough medicine: Amp wins.

I hate being sick. I guess I should try to get some sleep.

And this year...

2009-05-18T16:14:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm almost done with Kindergarten with both kids, and I'm already looking forward to the wonders that next year will reveal! I haven't updated this blog in an entire year, but I plan to post a lot more this year.

I have so enjoyed teaching the kids to read and especially seeing them grasp concepts about God from the wonderful My Father's World curriculum we used this year! Jace was just telling me how God is bigger than Daddy and bigger than everyone, and that God is the "main boss". My kids have never been allowed to go to church, so MFW has been just amazing. We will be going back to them for 1st grade.

What a fantastic year we have had! 3 more weeks until we are done with this year, but we will be doing lots of fun, hands-on things this summer to enrich our learning.

I have been knitting a beautiful Central Park Hoodie for myself out of Avocado green Lion Brand Wool Ease and I'm loving and hating it at the same time. I decided to add pockets to it, which was kind of complicated (for a novice like myself) AND I altered the pattern, making the cables wider, which further muddies the water. I think (and hope) I will really like the finished product. I really hope I made the right size. We shall see, soon.

It's official, I'm a book junkie!

2008-05-06T13:53:00.000-05:00

Lists, lists, lists! I keep finding these awesome book lists. Charlotte Mason, Sonlight, Five in a Row, AHHH! There are so many books that I want to buy, but right now I have higher priorities. It is so tempting to just nab every great book I see, especially at Amazon prices, but it adds up and I'm saving for a car.

I must have a car. I need a car. I need a car more than I need those books right now. A car can get me to the library, where I can borrow most of the books I want to buy. I have to keep telling myself these things so I don't go nuts on eBay and Amazon.

I've bought a few good books that are still in the mail right now, but I'm a junkie and I want more. I find books like The Children's Treasury of Virtues, and Life Skills for Kids: Equipping Your Child for the Real World, The Story About Ping, The Year At Maple Hill Farm, I get excited and just want them all right now. Not that we could read them all right now, but I want them. All. Right now.

It stinks being without a car in a city as spread-out as mine. There are many things within walking distance, but with 2 little ones in tow, any errand is an ordeal. I usually just wait for my husband to get home and use the car. It would be awfully nice to have a car to take the kids on field trips during the day. To the zoo or library or museum, or art class, botanical gardens, or whatever. And so I must hold back, and keep saving money, waiting and praying for the right car to come along. God is good, and even though I don't have many opportunities for my own income right now, I know God will provide for that which He ordains. If He wants me to have a car to help in raising my children, then it will not be impossible for me. I'll be a good steward and strive to be more thrifty. I know we must be faithful with little, first.

If anyone happens to read this, please say a prayer for the provision of a reliable vehicle for me and my children while my husband is at work.

BTW the titles I'm waiting on in the mail are:

The Complete Tales of Winnie-the-Pooh [Hardcover] by A. A. Milne
Italic Handwriting Series Book A [Paperback] by Barbara Getty
Beatrix Potter Complete Tales: The 23 Original Peter Rabbit Books [Hardcover] by Beatrix Potter
If You Give a Mouse a Cookie [Hardcover] by Laura Joffe Numeroff

Getting Started

2008-05-02T11:20:00.000-05:00

What a beautiful day it is in the Midwest today! Windy as usual, but a wonderful 63 degrees which means that I don't have to use the A/C again today! I love the few weeks in the spring and fall when we don't have to run the heater or air conditioner; our electric bill is so cheap. It's supposed to get down into the 30's tonight, which is strange since yesterday the high was in the 80's (and miserably humid). Enough about the weather, though... this really isn't a blog about the weather, honest.

I think it's kind of strange writing to no-one in particular, but everyone who wants to read this. I suppose that is what it's like to write a book, though. You're writing to your audience, whomever they may be. So to my audience, I write in hopes that something good will come from it.

My kids will be 4 and 5 this summer, so next year we are starting school (at home) and boy did this sneak up on me. I've spent the last few months researching my options and my eclectic curriculum is finally coming together. I have some wonderful homeschool moms at my tiny church whom have been extremely generous and continue to just give me their old curriculum and materials. Isn't that fantastic? I feel so blessed. God is so good to me. We are on a tight budget since only my husband works outside the home and we have 2 children to support, so the free materials are very much appreciated.

Saving money is part of something that has been on my heart and mind lately. I went back to reading a book that I had started a long time ago and never finished, and I've really been convicted about how I spend my time and energy as a wife and mother, and also encouraged and instructed on how to change that so I can bring more glory to God though my life.

The book is Created To Be His Help Meet by Debi Pearl. Their child training books and this book have been invaluable to me and my family. I don't agree with everything written in them or by the Pearls, but they have provided a kind of mentoring that I really needed and hadn't been able to find elsewhere. Any book besides the Bible, you have to just take what you can use and leave the rest. I don't subscribe to ideas that you shouldn't get your children vaccinated or take them to the doctor when they are sick, and I don't read only the King James Bible, and I'm not sure about some of the things that are said about abusive situations, but, thankfully, I'm not in any of those situations, so I don't have to worry about that right now.

I really did want to be the wife that God would have me be, but I didn't know how. I feel confident now in my position as a help-meet to my husband, happily serving him and learning to see the world as God sees it. Those closest to me have, at best, reservations about the way I understand my role in my marriage. Most think I'm sacrificing my own happiness unnecessarily and believe that I should demand what I want from my husband. Knowing what God's holy Word says to wives, how could I do that? Why would I? It doesn't work to demand love, anyway. I spent the first 4 years of my marriage demanding love and all it got me was almost a divorce, and a husband that didn't like me. That was almost 3 years ago, and I thank God for the wake-up call and the 2nd chance. I can honestly say that my husband likes me now... he loves me, has always loved me, but now he LIKES me. Just one wonderful by-product of seeking God's way for my life.

Now I'm concentrating on being busy and productive at home, training the children and planning for the school year ahead. I know I need to make a daily schedule, but I'm still thinking about that right now. I think the first thing I'll do is schedule 1 task for a specific time. Just one task. Then after we get used to having an appointed time to do one thing, I'll add another, and so on. I really need to get a feel for when would be the best time to do what. When would be the best time for reading, best time for free-play, best time to watch a video, best time for arts/crafts, and then meals, chores, etc. need to fall in-between.

I'm not the kind of person who likes a schedule, but I NEED one in order to accomplish what I want to accomplish. I know once we start school officially, we will definitely benefit from a daily schedule. I want to keep things light for now... light but deliberate. We just need to get used to the rhythm of it all and it will be easy from there. Kids love routine, I hear. It cuts down complaining and dragging of feet when they know what is expected of them every day. So I hear. ;)

I'm feeling lazy today. I've got a cold and I have that general malaise thing going on, and it's just not motivating me to fold laundry and wash dishes. Thankfully, tonight my husband works a little later than usual so I have a little extra time to get things done before he gets home. Anyway if anyone ever reads this, thanks for taking time to hear me ramble on and on. More to come, soon.
-OldSchoolMama

love, learning and yarn

summertime

Settled? THEN what do I do?

Goodbye, Wichtia.

Moving.

Sick.

Conflicted

Random things

Surprise

*ahhhh* change feels good.

who am I?

The Shack RETRACTION

We are Platypus, The Shack and Pandora

Winter, winter, everywhere.

What a trip!

Hopes and Dreams

Michael Jackson

8 years.... 4 of 'em wonderful!

Butterflies, Science and Fish

/J/.../J/...Jumping up and down in speech therapy

Rent

Working Moms

The Lost Art of Homemaking

Road trip!

Update on butterflies

Transformation

Birdius Maximus

Homeschooler Speech Therapy Goldmine!

If I hadn't been a mother

walk walk walk walk walk... and stuff.

Sick.

And this year...

It's official, I'm a book junkie!

Getting Started

ahhhh change feels good.