Working Moms

My mom was a stay at home mom. My mom was also a working mom. I was homeschooled for several years, and I was also publicly and privately educated for many years.

My mom was a great mom and she was very involved in our lives. I hated being a latchkey kid when she was working. I'm not saying that a working mom is bad or absent. Stay at home moms, especially if the kids are home, are around their kids more than working moms. This doesn't mean that stay at home moms are by default good mothers, nor are homeschooling moms. It's very difficult to express my thankfulness for my situation without offending those in different situations, especially when it touches on emotional subjects, like family.

I have very few friends who are stay at home moms, and far fewer who homeschool. I have reasons for the sacrifices our family makes so I can be home with the kids, and they home with me. My husband isn't a Christian. My kids aren't allowed to attend church. My son wears hearing aids and can't hear well in noisy environments like a kindergarten classroom. He also has a speech and language delay. These things plus public school would equate to a bright child at the bottom of his class who can't effectively communicate with his peers and would be taught godlessness and humanism by everyone except his mother for the few hours I would see him each evening.

I am not a very maternal person. I don't like babies. I don't really like children. I love my children, and I know my ultimate responsibility as a mother is to train them up in the way they should go. "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth" (III John 4).

My plan, when I had Jace, was to go back to work when he went to school (and then when I had Rachel, I added a year to that). I went back to school, I was ready to go back to work, but we found out about Jace's disability. Public school just isn't the best option for him. I didn't want to homeschool, but I spent the entire Fall and Summer before Jace started school researching and praying. The answer to my prayers was clear.

To the working mothers, and all other mothers out there, I do not know what is right for you. You can be a fantastic mother and work, or a crappy one. You can be a fantastic mother and stay home or you can be a crappy one that your children wish didn't stay home. I'm just trying to be obedient to the voice of my Master. I didn't mean to offend anyone in my zeal for master meatball recipes and cheap laundry detergent. I will look over my original post again and see if maybe I worded some things poorly. I was really just happy to find a site to help me learn and teach my daughter how to run a household and save money (which we need to do on one income). I figured someone would probably take offense, but my reasons for my choices are legitimate, and I would have to pretend they aren't in order to not offend someone.

When I speak of my life, I'm not criticizing you for your choices, I am simply thanking God for my life, for His help, His guidance and provision. Sorry for rambling, my thoughts aren't always organized.

I also have to say that I do believe it is best for children to have their mothers at home (as long as the mother isn't a terrible, abusive mother). No one else has as vested an interest in their child's success, well-being and happiness. No one. I know not everyone can stay home, but I do believe it is the best thing for young children. I know that will ruffle some feathers, but it is a harsh reality I had to face before I committed to staying home, myself.

Reminds me of the lyrics of a song:
"promises are only mercenary troops. They bear no real allegiance to the soil. When they fight they always look around. They have never really been in touch with the ground..."

Teachers, day care providers, therapists, paras, non of them are about your child's success like you do. They do their job because it is their job, and many do it well, but none of them have your child as the highest priority.